Being an Active Listener
Many people find it challenging to listen attentively because of the way our brain processes communication. People can speak an average of 130 words per minute; however, listeners have the ability to hear and process between four and five times that number of words per minute, between 520-650 words per minute.[1]
When we listen to a speaker, at an average rate of 130 words per minute, our brain has additional unused capacity: a void. In order to use that additional capacity, listeners find themselves thinking about other things such as thinking about how they will respond to the speaker after they have finished. Listeners also think of many other things such as planning for a meeting later in the afternoon or even what they will have for lunch.
Although it seems nearly impossible to identify these situations when reflecting on previous conversations, the next time you are involved in a conversation with someone, pay attention to how many times you drift in a conversation or begin thinking about your response before the other person has finished speaking. This can be called response rehearsing. Response rehearsing is one of the biggest barriers to listening. Many people also try to anticipate what the person will say next; causing them to miss what is actually being said. In the 2+2=5 program, Hannah, age twelve, further developed our understanding of the importance of being a good listener by saying, “We clarified the goal by listening so that we were all on the same page and knew what to do.” Brian, her teammate added, “We needed each person to understand the strategy or else this couldn’t be done. If even one person didn’t listen, the team would have failed.”
Please add your comments about how to succeed at the challenges of listening…
[1] Boyd, S.D. (2001). The human side of teaching: Effective listening. Techniques:Connecting Education & Careers, 76 (7), 60-61.
photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/baking_in_pearls/1171410778
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